Saadia's Side: Everything can wait
We are constantly pressured by the need to be busy at all times. Even a little break puts us in guilt
Even my tired feels tired today. I have not told you all about myself yet because neither I remembered nor would you care to read scores on a person’s persona. Sometimes I feel this daily column has come as a blessing to me because this will help me look back into my evolution over one year (in case, you bear me for a year.) So yeah, coming back to the point. It comes as a surprise (read: shock) to most of the people that I take neither tea nor coffee. This is not a recent development. It has been there ever since. There are only occasional breaks when I start my day with a cup of a darker than moonless night cup of coffee. Yesterday was not one of those days.
As I mentioned in my yesterday’s column that I have just come back from Pakistan and am aiming to look like Deepika Padukone by the time my sister gets married in October, I have officially started my low carbohydrates diet today. Since yesterday was the last day of my supposed holiday, I decided to get an iced caramel latte so that the sweetness of the french vanilla bean ice cream and the smoothness of thick whipped cream could dilute the essence of bitter espresso. To be honest, I got this chilled coffee just for the sake of icecream and whipped cream.
Cutting the long story short, this dose of caffeine at 6 pm was enough for my not-that-used-to self to stay up all night. I would change sides, roll on the bed, scroll through my social media feed, count 1082394 sheep, think about the colour of the sari I intend to wear on my sister’s Barat, and whatever I could to sleep. As soon as the dawn creaked, I partially fell asleep. Here is a problem with the early risers. No matter when we sleep we are up by that particular hour of the morning when everyone else is enjoying the climax of their dream. Hence, it has been quite a tiring day.
My day started with the usual breakfast regime, stacking dishes from the dishwasher into the cabinets, getting on to my job, then rushing to the gym during my lunch break (after a gap of six weeks hence all the cramps), working fast on the deadline that I had to meet, preparing my diet food both for today’s dinner and tomorrow’s lunch, and then juggling to finish my conversation (aka Saadia’s Side) with you. Not to forget, as soon as I finish writing I will clean the house and fold today’s laundry.
My feet and headache with the same force. There are only a few hours left for today. I guess my head has started spinning too. Good going!
As I struggle through my aching body and a numb mind, I also wonder why we humans are obsessed with the need to do something all the time. It is not only me but many of my friends who do never want to get bored and need to be doing something all the time. Guilt holds our arm the moment we put our feet up for a little while and do simply nothing. By nothing I literally mean nothing.
Even when we go on holidays we are stressed about this constant race of being to as many places as possible. We all walk down the streets of Rome with a bucket list in our hand which does not let us enjoy a moment of peace but constantly makes us question how many ádventures’ are we left with. When I moved to Dubai from Pakistan, I had this constant pressure of visiting all important landmarks of Dubai which definitely included a top view of Burj Khalifa, desert safari, Ski Dubai, Ferrari World in Abu Dhabi, and what not. Why could I not simply enjoy the breeze that blew in December instead of stressing where all I was supposed to go and énjoy?
I could have taken a short nap today. I could have ordered some pizza in. I could probably write a little less and make up for it the next day. My laundry could wait. No one is coming over for a house inspection. Some stains on the floor and some undone dishes can wait. Maybe today’s column could have been shorter. Maybe I did not need to spend my lunch break in the gym lifting weights like a burden, Maybe I could have put my feet up, closed my eyes, and thought of being on the bank of the blue waters in Auckland. I could simply have done nothing and taken pride in it. Why could I not spend a day without hustling and panting on the finish line of this unknown race? What is the success that comes with a tired body and exhausted mind? Maybe I need to shut my eyes closed and breathe in and out. I now realise that I should have taken a day off. Everything could wait, even my guilt.
Remind me not to have coffee at 6 pm again, please.