Movie Review: Mr X
Will the Emraan Hashmi-starrer create another Bollywood legend like Mr India? Here's what City 1016's Lokesh Dharmani has to say
STARRING: Emraan-hell-yeah-I-am-kissing-in-this-film-too-Hashmi, Amyra-yaar-no-item-number-for-me-Dastur and Tanmay-I-am-also-a-Bhatt-Bhatt
RATING: 1.5 stars
There is good news. And bad news. Good news: the film ended. Phew!! Bad news: it ended with a possibility of a sequel. Yes Mr X might strike back. And then back again. And then it will be called Mr. XXX! And then Sunny Leone will have some tough competition.
Mr X opens with a critical situation where ATD is dealing with a terrorist who has held a bus of innocent people hostage.
The scene has all the clichés in the world:
a) Kohl-eyed terrorist.
b) A time bomb with ticking digits in blood red.
c) Blue-green-yellow wires to cut to confuse the little mickey out of you.
d) And, of course, a bimbette who diffuses the bomb by cutting one of those colorful wires just two seconds before it explodes!
And then? And then the lead pair kiss. Dah. It's an Emraan Hashmi film.
There is a very interesting scientific story behind how Emraan Hashmi gets invisible in the movie. And trust me it's not a spoiler. The entire movie is.
A bomb blast is followed by Emraan Hashmi being rushed to a medical research centre where they test medicines on rats. A melodramatic lady is in a white coat for the effect. No one knows if she is a doctor/nurse/compounder/scientist/peon. She is called 'didi'. Didi has a million expressions on her face; the antithesis of Katrina Kaif. She frowns, twitches her lips nervously and mouths some very very, very scientific dialogues-
"Cellular structures… chemicals… radiations… white light… red… infra-red… violet… ULTRA violet..." and then something more that she can neither phonetically articulate nor understand. At the end of it she offers (hold your breath for this one) a blue-coloured test tube that she claims has anti-radiation medicine waiting to be tested on rats, so she is not sure how it will react on Emraan Hashmi. With not much option, Emraan takes the test tube, raises a toast and, I kid you not, does a full bottoms up with the medicine.
The results of the medicine served in a test tube are very pleasant though: Emraan Hashmi becomes invisible. Trust me he is a far better actor when you can’t see him.
And then there is Amyra Dastur who screams heaves and believes in ‘kanoon ko apne haath mein mat lo’ philosophy! She is so dedicated to her job and country that the fact her fiancé can do a Mr India on everyone doesn’t surprise her wee bit. She even has epic lines in the movie: "*heaves* Mera kaam hi mujhe *heaves* is sadme se bacha sakta hain sir…*heaves some more*"
Let’s just say Mr. X is a quarterly deal between the Bhatts and their bhanja with everything typically Vishesh films --- hot Chiquita, check, bad CG, check and kissing scenes, hell check!!
My only question to Mr. X was Y! Why were you made? Watch it only if you are a huge Hashmi fan.
WHAT THE RATINGS MEAN
5 stars: Loved it. (This could make to top ten movies you must watch before you die!)
4 stars: Liked it. Recommend it. (This will help you sound intellectual and give you stuff to add at water cooler conversations.)
3 stars: Didn’t hurt. Watch it once.
2 stars: It put me to sleep. Watch it if you are an insomniac or a newly wedded couple. Winks!
1 star: Do I even need to explain this?