She was tall, dark and desirous. Distinct from her preening peers. Mahesh Bhatt’s musical Aashiqui, a romance with real hues, catapulted newcomer Anu Aggarwal to the apex. Overnight stardom, producers vying for her and the media eyeing her… it all got so ‘insane’ that the spiritually inclined Anu left the fireworks and fame for the tranquil yoga university along the Ganges. Two years later, a traumatic car accident, 29 days of coma, and an out-of-body experience… altered Anu forever.
Her Instagram profile describes her as ‘Aham Brahmasmi (I am divine)… actor, yoga therapist, author, motivational speaker… Indeed hers has been a second coming to a life that’s now lived for others. From diva to dvija (twice-born)… possessing nothing and possessed by nothing…hers has been an ‘Anusual’ narrative.
Excerpts from Anu Aggarwal’s interview
MASALA: You’ve often mentioned that Krishna’s consciousness was part of your childhood. Could you elaborate on that?
ANU AGGARWAL: Austerity, cleanliness, truthfulness and compassion are the four principles of Krishna dharma. I come from a deeply spiritually aware family where spirituality hardly meant blind worship of a particular God. We focused on being socially conscious about the good of others.
MASALA: What was it about the autobiography of a yogi, which left you impressed as a teen?
ANU AGGARWAL: I was not a teen yet. I was around three-four years old when I saw the Autobiography Of A Yogi on a shelf in my grandfather’s library. It is hard to describe the feeling. But it was an ecstatic joy as my eyes got locked with those of Swami Yogananda.
MASALA: What brought you to modeling?
ANU AGGARWAL: The late Parmeshwar Godrej saw a photo of mine somewhere and chose me. Next, I got a call from the ad agency Mudra. I had been chosen to model for the Godrej soap Marvel.
MASALA: What made Mahesh Bhatt believe that you were the perfect choice for Aashiqui (1990)?
ANU AGGARWAL: Apparently, Mahesh Bhatt saw a similarity between me and the character in Aashiqui – a girl who dreams of being independent over everything else.
MASALA: Aashiqui remains a cult film. Why?
ANU AGGARWAL: There are many who contributed towards it being a cult film. Aashiqui does have a timeless feel. The difficulties the characters in the movie face are based on true life happenings. The emotions are relevant even today — like a son dealing with his father’s second marriage and a mother left alone. Also, a girl who struggles to find a place for herself, alone, in society.
MASALA: Aashiqui made you an overnight star. Can you describe the dramatic change?
ANU AGGARWAL: I was sleeping on the floor on a mattress in my PG dig in Juhu in Mumbai when I woke up one morning to hundreds of people shouting excitedly, ‘Anu, Anu, Anu’! That day I realized there were so many buildings around my flat, which had so many people living there. The other realisation was that I had become the focus of people, a public figure which was awesome. But it was extremely hard for girls, who lived alone in the 90s. We didn’t have the infrastructure for it.
MASALA: At a time, when actors didn’t do brand endorsements, you did a condom ad. What kind of reactions did it invite?
ANU AGGARWAL: Yes those days actors were ignored when it came to brand endorsements. Since I was already a supermodel, the advertising agency heads knew me and asked me to model for a condom. “How can you be the brand ambassador for a condom? Think of films, nobody is going to take you as an actor!” said a media mogul. But my acting career didn’t get affected by doing it. Maybe, it got a boost. I don’t know.
MASALA: Mani Ratnam’s Thiruda Thiruda, Ghazab Tamasha, King Uncle, Khalnayika, The Cloud Door… won you further popularity. Did you enjoy being in the spotlight?
ANU AGGARWAL: Being in the spotlight is a double-edged sword. So where it’s exhilarating on one hand it puts you on raging fire on the other. Perhaps, being alone with no family protection was troublesome at a time as it was unaccepted. It had bizarre connotations in the early 90s.
MASALA: Were you perturbed by link-ups? Did they affect your relationship with your reported boyfriend, Anglo-Indian jazz musician Rick?
ANU AGGARWAL: As long as I don’t lie, cheat or hurt anyone my life is mine and I am free to be me. Nothing wrong with link-ups but when they are lies they hurt. They start to influence your real relationships. That’s how my relationship with Rick saw the light of day and ended.
MASALA: What made you enroll in an ashram in Uttarakhand in 1997 at the height of fame?
ANU AGGARWAL: Yoga ashram came about with a ‘Who am I?’ quest — to know myself, self-development, growth, evolution… But more than anything else it was my disappointment with what came as a superstar… I was the unhappiest ever. I am a socially conscious and sensitive person, who thinks not just about me but of those around me too. Fabricated lies to sell their products, paper… I believe is not fair.
MASALA: You mentioned in your memoir unusual that the ashram gave you a new name, a demolished ego and awareness about tantric sex.
ANU AGGARWAL: Just to inform you it wasn’t just an ashram. It was one of the top international yoga universities in the world. I enrolled to study and train in depth in the psychology, philosophy and science of yoga as therapy. Firstly, I had a 360-degree turn. I was a night- bird but I began rising at 4 am to do Suryanamsakar. That was the time I used to go to sleep! Then the Big Swamiji himself, without my asking, gave me a spiritual name ‘Anandapriya’, which means lover of bliss.
Tantric sex is amazing in a spiritual context as it can be used as a propellant for self-realization when performed correctly. In simple words, it means when you can transcend the gratification principle, which normal sexual activity thrives on. To perform it is not easy. It requires a set of some difficult purification exercises for the body and mind before you can actually perform tantric sex. I was to write a book on it.
MASALA: The ashram stint was followed by a devastating car crash in 1999 and being in a coma for 29 days. How did you rehabilitate yourself once you regained consciousness?
ANU AGGARWAL: People normally see my car crash as something tragic. Yes, the trauma, the multiple fractures including a skull fracture, left my body in shambles. It was a tough time. Doctors thought I would not make it. But it brought my next level of spiritual purification, which I am blessed to have experienced. It’s something unheard of.
MASALA: Your revival is nothing short of a miracle. Did it give you a new perspective on life?
ANU AGGARWAL: We’re supposed to be made of mind and matter, which is what holds us together. So when I lost my body and mind, I went to the deepest level inside us, the soul, Atma or spirit. It totally changed my perspective as I realised the ignorance we live in. Also, the realization of my purpose, which is to serve, give and love, became clear.
MASALA: Were you distraught by the focus on your ‘before’ and ‘after’ pictures floating around rather than an empathetic take on the episode?
ANU AGGARWAL: To begin with when you can’t eat, speak, walk or communicate, which I suffered for years, it’s beyond devastating. People’s support in such times can be a massive help in recovery. But the media going negative was actually a confirmation of how difficult my situation has always been – a single girl trying to make it on my own. There was hardly any acceptance from society. I have won the worst battles single-handedly. I thank the media today for making me stronger and still keeping me positive and caring toward them and others. That was the biggest test.
MASALA: In 2001, you took sanyas, shaved off your head, sold off your apartment, car…why?
ANU AGGARWAL: Sanyas were pending as the Paramhamsa Swamiji conferred I was ready for it after he quietly observed my habits, beliefs, attitudes, ‘samskaras’. But then I had a car crash. So it was the first thing on my bucket list the minute I got off the bedridden state and began walking. Also, my will to serve the needy was the only reason for me to continue living.
MASALA: Tell us how you inspire others to make yoga a way of life.
ANU AGGARWAL: Yoga is a philosophy of liberation, of the final merging with God, the superpower, the divine, the cosmic being, who runs the entire drama on earth through Maya. But for that to happen, you need to be mentally and physically healthy first. For that, I have made a simple Anufunyoga, which is a combination of my years of study, practice and miracle self-healing.
MASALA: Is the Anu Aggarwal Foundation (AAF) the culmination of your quest to support lives and make a difference?
ANU AGGARWAL: To further my caring love for the community I registered my foundation AAF. I have a platform for teaching Anufunyoga and raising inner joy to de-stress people. Since children are the adults of tomorrow, I began with underprivileged kids, who’re the most neglected and needy of attention. I use inventive yoga to raise their self-worth. My priority was those most challenged like HIV+ kids, orphans, runaway distressed women, the blind and so on. We have touched hearts, sowed the seeds of love and reached over two lakhs people already. The list is only growing..
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