- 1 / 2
Starring- Harman Baweja, Sunny Deol, Ayesha Khanna and Aditya Pancholi
Director- Sanamjit Singh Talwar
Rating – One star
Dear Producer Shilpa Shetty,
We understand your better half, Raj Kundra is a multi-millionaire. Please go buy a yacht, a villa, an island maybe, go blow it up in LA or splurge on expensive brands in Paris. But please, pretty please, picture-me-on-my-knees-please, don’t make films like Dishkiyaoon.
A pained critic
Dishkiyaoon is a story about a boy called Viki whose mother passes away at a young age (Soooo saddddd!) and his father shoves Gandhian ways down his throat (Preachy papa Hmph!!) which don’t work in school, the bad world of bullies. He has two good friends, Ketan and Jia who help him take a decision by choosing one finger. Awww so cute! NOT! Because we, as kids, chose fingers and tossed a coin to choose between a burger or a pizza. Here these kids do it to decide whether or not they should meet a gangster to beat the bully in school.
Viki grows up to be one of the gangsters and dedicates his life to creating a larger-than-life heroic image that threatens the dark world of the city. In this attempt of outdoing and avenging his (don’t laugh) adopted father, he goes from one gangster to the other, keeping a track of which left me breathless and confused. So check this out - there is a Tony, a Rocky, a Gujjur, a Ketan, a Bhonsle, a Khan sahib, a Salim Chacha, a Sawant and a Khaleefa. It’s not a movie; it’s a wholesale market of gangsters, available in all shapes and sizes. The situations are even more bizarre. In one scene, Rocky asks Viki to spell the don’s name at gun point. He goes- K H A L I F A. Rocky holding the gun tenses his temples, blood in his eyes and screams- ‘wrooooonggggg answeeeeerr it’s K H A L E E F A’! (And I win the Spelling Bee championship, yayyyy!!)
Harman-now-available-in-six-pack-Baweja is earnest but too sweet to play a rugged goon. He might speak through smoke rings, grow a stubble, wear a ganji and a leather jacket but when he speaks to the wholesale market of hoodlums, he starts his sentences with ‘Aap’ and ends them with a ‘ji’. Short of saying khana kha ke jana, okay, he does it all! With hot girlfriend Bipasha and hotter producer Shilpa’s collective supply of yoga DVDs, he has surely beefed up. Alas there are no acting DVDs available in the market. I feel bad for Harman. I can’t believe he chose a Dishkiyaoon to break his five years of acting hibernation after 2009 release ‘Whats Your Rashee’.
Sunny Deol plays Luckwa, a Haryanvi thug, which when he forgets, conveniently inserts an ‘oye Chaudhary’ in his dialogues to establish he is from Haryana. This time his dhai kilo ka haath is not working, just a finger does. Hey that’s like shamelessly based on Kaal of Krissh 3. (And Vivek Oberoi sheds a khushi ke aansoo or two to learn Sunny paaji has taken inspiration from his role. Pass me on the tissue please, sob sob, can’t take so much of emotions, too much!)
My excuse is the review I have to write. I wonder what those seven people’s excuses were who had come to watch the film, half of them were not even desis. The upside of casting a Hrithik lookalike maybe! The attempt is to create a Satya or a Company, alas it’s all cigarette smoke and no substance.
INFO: DISHKIYAOON IS PLAYING AT CINEMAS INCLUDING GRAND CINEMAS IN DUBAI (WAFI, FESTIVAL CITY, IBN BATTUTA MALL AND AL GHURAIR CENTRE), ABU DHABI (ABU DHABI MALL), SHARJAH (MEGAMALL AND SAHARA CENTRE), AL AIN (ROTANA) AND RAS AL KHAIMAH (MANAR MALL) www.grandcinemas.com; VOX CINEMAS IN DUBAI (MIRDIF CITY CENTRE, DEIRA CITY CENTRE, MALL OF THE EMIRATES, MERCATO MALL), AJMAN (AJMAN CITY CENTRE), FUJAIRAH (FUJAIRAH CITY CENTRE) AND RAS AL KHAIMAH (AL HAMRA MALL), www.voxcinemas.com and MEYDAAN IMAX, www.imax.com/theatres/t/meydan-imax/.